Custom Search


Welcome to my blog!

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Two Poems

Here are two poems I wrote for NaPoWriMo days 20 and 21.

This poem is from day #20, which was the 15th anniversary of Columbine. I think I'm going to edit it because I want to include more of how he overcame (for those of you that know, you know why that is powerful for me), but what do you think?

Nightmares (Columbine: 15 Years Later)

As night descends and the stars fall,
when the monster's paws begin to claw;
the vicious nail reach under the door,
you try with all your might on the lava floor
to hold with your shoes, you have to save,
the monster pounds and pounds and heat waves
surround you and you can't move or scream,
all goes black and growling grows to a sheen
crescendo, it sounds like the pits of Hell
where Satan calls out and in a commanding yell,
"You are worthless! It is all your fault!"
and in your last conscious moment opens the vault--
grabbing your pillow and screaming in fright,
for 15 years this has been your life night after night.

Yet, you revisit 15 years later as you shake,
your thoughts jumble and your feet hardly make;
but as you walk with your mentor, your friend,
the nasty and disorienting thoughts end.
As you reach the janitor's closet where you were spared,
calmly you tell your story about how your shoes ware
from keeping the door closed from Eric and Dylan,
you saved a bunch of people, but can you call them villains?
You stand here, victorious, some would call it small,
but for countless other survivors who usually fall--
this victory is huge and life changing, but you deeply breathe,

praying that this will finally keep your nights free.

This was from day #21 of NaPoWriMo, which I'll post the whole assignment.

It's day 21 of NaPoWriMo, nine more days! Today I am using a prompt from the NaPoWriMo site: "Today’s prompt is to write a “New York School” poem using the recipe found here. The New York School is the name by which a group of poets that all lived in New York in the 1950s and 1960s. The most well-known members are Frank O’Hara, John Ashbery, and Kenneth Koch. Their poems are actually very different from one another, but many “New York School” poems display a sort of conversational tone, references to friends and to places in and around New York, humor, inclusion of pop culture, and a sense of the importance of art (visual, poetic, and otherwise)."

Here are the ingredients that you have to use as many as possible:

at least one addressee (to which you may or may not wish to dedicate your poem)
use of specific place names and dates (time, day, month, year)--especially the names of places in and around New York City
prolific use of proper names
at least one reminiscence, aside, digression, or anecdote
one or more quotations, especially from things people have said in conversation or through the media
a moment where you call into question at least one thing you have said or proposed throughout your poem so far
something that sounds amazing even if it doesn’t make any sense to you
pop cultural references
consumer goods/services
mention of natural phenomena (in which natural phenomena do not appear ‘natural’)
slang/colloquialism/vernacular/the word "fuck"
at least one celebrity
at least one question directed at the addressee/imagined reader
reference to sex or use of sexual innuendo
the words “life” and “death”
at least one exclamation/declaration of love
references to fine art, theater, music, or film
mention of genitals and body parts
food items
drug references (legal or illegal)
mention of sleep or dreaming
use of ironic overtones

Poem #1 (Monoxide Has Received My Letter!)
2014 Jessica Marie

Monoxide has received my long, drawn out letter!
He received it on Christmas Day 2013 in Roseville, Michigan,
but brought it to the 21 Club in New York City in late February;
I wish I would have known because I would have loved to meet him,
instead I planned my move to Roseville, wouldn't it be funny
if Monoxide and I became neighbors? Hopefully he's not unnerved,
after all I found his address on Google and then sent him a letter.
"Don't let your loyalty become your slavery,
if they don't appreciate what you bring to the table- make them eat alone,"
Monoxide is very wise. Fuck Pennsylvania and those that ran away;
I can meet Eminem, I remember wanting to marry him when I was 12,
but don't worry, Monoxide, I would rather marry you at almost 25;
would you marry me, though? We could have a grand wedding cake,
you could smoke lots of weed and other guests could get drunk on Goose-
til death do us part- in sickness and health, a love that lasts for life.
But, one could only dream. However, maybe, when I get to Roseville--
Monoxide has received my long, drawn out letter!

Eh, I like Frank O'Hara's better because it feels more natural and I want that natural feel to it than just a list. But, I think this led to my good dream last night. Anyway, here is Frank O'Hara's Laura Turner Has Collapsed

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Happy Easter! 2014

Happy Easter dear readers! I hope everyone had a great Easter - I hope everyone had a peaceful day filled with love and compassion. I won't get into many details about my day, but cuddling up to Aunt Peg's cat Felix and playing with her corgi, Keira, and seeing some other family members put me at ease. Our fare was good with ham, mac n cheese, pineapple stuffing, vegetables and then a homemade cheesecake. I also had hot tea, but was careful with the wisdom tooth area. My camera died, so I relied on my cell phone to take pictures. I didn't go out to see Uncle Tom's bees with everyone else because of the camera not working. The last time I saw them was last year (4/27) and maybe I should have, but I kept my little cousin company. Doug then played the piano for us, which was relaxing.

I'm now watching "The Road Home" on Dateline NBC. Today marks the 15th anniversary of Columbine. I remember it like it was yesterday - I was in 3rd grade and even at that young of an age I watched the news... I just loved watching the news. I remember getting home from Caley and I turned on the news and it was breaking news. I remember being glued to the TV and no one could pull me away from the TV... I didn't go out to play that day. I remember feeling angry and injustice. I remember I used to get very angry at the world at that time. Anyway, on this 15th anniversary this episode follows a Columbine survivor and he takes a road trip to Jonesboro, AR (middle school students shot up a middle school in 1998), Minnesota (school shooting in 2005) and Virginia Tech to connect with other survivors. The survivor's name is Sam and he said to the Jonesboro survivors, "I feel like I shouldn't be talking to you. You were so young when this happened." or something to that effect, but the former teacher said, "No, you're a survivor too. You went through a trauma and survived that trauma." I'm crying as I watch this, but I need to watch this. I really need to watch this because I am a survivor too... not in that sense, but yeah. I really was transformed by the words of the Jonesboro survivors: since the perps were under 18 (12 and 14), they were released after 5-7 years, which really sucks. Anyway, I'm rambling.

I'll make the Google+ album later!

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Wisdom Tooth Update

Today I had my dentist appointment and when I arrived my dentist asked me how my mouth felt; asked if I needed pain medication. I said, "The other teeth are fine now, but it hurts a little where the wisdom tooth was. Tylenol works, though." He smiled and said, "That tooth was pretty deep, but glad you're feeling better." Since it was my 6 month check up, he looked at my mouth and said my teeth look really good. He also said the gum area around where my tooth was is healing fine; it should be healed in a month or so. I finished my antibiotic today (YAY!) and I told him I rinsed my mouth out with water. Today's exam was quick and painless, which was good.

Dad has his checkup as well, he had a good one too. Dad always had good teeth; me on the other hand. I have a small mouth so when I was a child I had a few teeth pulled for an overcrowding issue. Then old dentists who had no idea what they were doing ruined other aspects of my mouth. I was glad when we found this one in 2006 because he cares and is a good dentist. When I move I want to find a good dentist. I told my dentist my plan since he always asks. He immigrated from China and I told him I'm relocating to Michigan, just waiting for a retail job that will allow me to transfer in a month or so. He said he liked the Midwest; he went to school in Kansas. He wished me luck and smiled at my plan.

I'll miss my dentist when I move, but I know here isn't working and as they always say, "nothing lasts forever." I have faith I'll find good doctors in Michigan. A friend suggested some places, it's just waiting to see what insurance whatever job offers. It was a nice day. Tomorrow is Easter and I'm nervous.

I'm calling it a night. My Twiztid CD did come today. I'm going to give it a listen and tomorrow either before or after dinner I will review it. :)

Friday, April 18, 2014

The Secret Life of Blogger's Blog Party: Just Like Heaven (4/12-4/18)

As I was riding around with mom today, the Cure came on and it’s been a long time since I've listened to the Cure. "Just Like Heaven" is one of my favorite songs. I'm going to buy that song along with "Friday I'm In Love" tonight. Started as a rough week, but it's ending on a good note.

Saturday, April 12

I had my wisdom tooth pulled. Ouch. My dentist did the procedure - 3 shots of Novocain and an hour later, it was out. It was a little nerve-racking and I was shaking.

My dentist was amazed at the way the tooth looked. He even took a picture of it. I thought it looked like an octopus.

That night I dog-sat Daphne and Sandy. Daphne laid (on the floor) beside me.

I even had ice cream for the pain. Well, in my mind I thought it would work, but teeth are sensitive.

Sunday, April 13

Look at this sun!

It got close to 80 degrees today; I was too tired and in pain to enjoy it, though.

I did go shopping with mom so I could get soft foods to eat. Here are a few displays I saw:

I wanted these, maybe if they're around next week I'll get them for when I move out. :D

I ended up with kosher Matzo ball soup and Apple Kugel. Delish!

We went to Pet Smart for Mimi's food, look at the cute mice sleeping! I love mice and rats. :3

Monday, April 14

It's that time of week again! Going to be a light week since I'm still recovering from the wisdom tooth:

1. Work on some writing pieces for childhood folder.
2. Continue with NaPoWriMo

I left work a half an hour early today, my mouth hurt.

But, the swelling went down a bit.

Look at Mimi sleeping in the sun. Another beautiful day… once I had a few aspirin in me and before my 3rd antibiotic of the day, I went for a quick walk.

Tuesday, April 15

Tax day! Fortunately both state and federal taxes were done way before this. It was a very rainy day and the temperatures really dropped.

As you can see, the trashcan drifted down the street.

I went to get the mail and I'm soaked. Swelling went down a bit.

I made myself couscous for lunch because my mouth still hurt.

Wednesday, April 16

Went to work today. Took a picture of this again. I think it's better:
It's the recycled Catholic. Basically, a loved one comes back in spirit in the form of a cardinal to let you know they are there to guide you.

Later today, I saw a female Cardinal in the yard:

I like to think that's nan visiting and giving me luck for relocating.

I submitted this one for the contest. I hope I win!

I'm a proud libertarian, but don't really have the cash to donate: goes to show everyone asks for money!

My soft meal for tonight.

Oh, my Twiztid CD shipped!

Here is what the album cover will look like:

Thursday, April 17

I worked today instead because the library is closed tomorrow for Good Friday. I found some awesome children's books. I like checking them out since I'm thinking of writing one. I found Stellaluna, which was my favorite as a little girl, and a book about a duck rescue.

I am feeling better, teeth wise, today. I went out for a walk and took pictures of the trees in bloom and flowers.

The cold has this pansy down (50 degrees today):

I also saw these adorable Greyhounds. She comes to the library sometimes.

I also took a picture with Mimi, who was sunbathing.

Swelling went down too!

I then took Mimi outside

And noticed the Lily of the Valleys are starting to pop up! YAY! They bloom in May, though.

Oh, here's an episode of Tom and Jerry. It was disturbing because the chick was trying to commit suicide… it was very obvious, especially when he tries to chop his head off. Wanted to cry, but it was a happy ending. ::sigh::

Looks like there was another one.

Friday, April 18

Looks like my CD is in Philadelphia right now. Hopefully that means I get it today! I so totally can't wait to move; maybe I'll be able to pick up my orders or it'll take less time to ship and be cheaper (this was $3.50 to ship, not bad). It didn't come today. :( Dad did get this though!

Our favorite commercial. 

According to it left Philadelphia, so hopefully tomorrow! They estimated 1-3 days, so I guess 3 days.

Mom and I went to get our nails done. Bye bye Tigers logo. :( The French manicure looks pretty though!

We even went for gelato. It was hazelnut and so good!

Beautiful cardinal on Good Friday.

It's that time of week again!

1. Work on some writing pieces for childhood folder.
I didn't. After doing some things and working plus the antibiotic and pain, I was tired. I'm feeling better, so I'm going to sit down tomorrow to work on some pieces. I'm going to write about my experience being bullied.
2. Continue with NaPoWriMo
It was a successful week with that. :)

What I accomplished instead of writing for my folder:
This is what I will probably go with if the ratings check out. I joined and as other locals were explaining to me with the bus schedule, I should stick near Gratiot Rd and it’s near that. :)

This is also near Utica Rd., which someone else also said was good.

It doesn't have a walk score. I like it, so I might have to call or post it to City-Data. I think once I figure out finances, I might attempt to learn to drive.

It's near Gratiot, but this might be something I ask about too.

I also applied at Costco in both King of Prussia (PA) and Roseville (MI), I'm going to apply at Foot Locker or at least see if there's a Foot Locker in Michigan, Penney's and see where the Bed Bath and Beyond is in Michigan. I really hope I hear from something soon!

Before I end this, here is this week's Friday Fluff!

This is @rivertherat, a beautiful hairless rat. She's blind, but has some wonderful adventures with her other rat friends. It's a great account to follow.

This is Gary at @omgdeedee. I love following his adventures and quirky photos.

Mr. Bagel is right - chinchillas should be treated like cats and dogs while riding a plane! @chinnybuddy.

Well, that's it for this week; I'm glad my mouth is starting to feel better and in time for Easter. I hope everyone has a great holiday, but don't eat too much and enjoy your family as much as you can! If you can, please check out my wish list.